Thursday, September 2, 2010

fragile

I actually wrote this post a few weeks ago, I thought it might be a bit gloomy so I just saved it for myself. Today I got some sad news that brought me back to this. My sweet cousin lost her little baby who was expected to come into the world very soon. I feel so much love for her and her family and feel sad for their loss. As my mom told me about how her family has come together and felt so much love for each other I was reminded of how close my family became during the time that my brother had leukemia and after he passed away. When family passes from this life the veil becomes so thin and there are so many spiritual experiences that can bring a more eternal perspective to life.
A few weeks back I was thinking a lot about how crazy life is. On my second to last day in my capstone clinical I assisted a full-term mom who came in with decreased fetal movement which lead to the discovery that the baby no longer had a heartbeat. It was heartbreaking to see them slowly start to get past the initial shock and feel so much pain. Only a week earlier I discovered some bad news about one of the first deliveries I helped with this spring- a cute husband and wife with a little girl having their #2, I had run into them a few weeks later and they were so happy. Then I found out the mom recently got hit while cycling and was killed.
That same week was also the anniversary of when my brother brother Jimmy passed away. I've been learning some big life lessons my whole life, but have always had a strong family and knowledge of the gospel to get through things. I'm grateful for that, I don't want to say I'm grateful for trials I've had, but I can say that I know they make you stronger. I don't know how anyone could get through life's challenges without the gospel to provide comfort and peace. It's so important for me to be able to know that there is purpose in going through these experiences and what we can achieve as we overcome our trials. I know life's challenges make our lives richer and can make us better people. You never know people's secret challenges, but when you know someone who seems like they haven't had to deal with much yet in life I find that they also normally seem kind of empty. We are all here to be tested and tried to help our progression. Challenges can refine us at super speed if we remain faithful through them. I'm grateful to have such a wonderful family, extended family, and ancestors who have given me amazing examples of faith.
I absolutely loved this talk that our prophet, President Monson gave during the last general conference. He taught, "to understand the meaning of death, we must appreciate the purpose of life. The most glorious, comforting, and reassuring of all events of human history had taken place—the victory over death."
In a previous talk he said "How fragile life is, how certain death. We do not know when we will be required to leave this mortal existence. And so I ask, 'What are we doing with today?'"

3 comments:

Natasha said...

I didn't think that was gloomy. Thankfully, the hope of the gospel brightens the gloomiest of topics and situations. Thanks for sharing your experiences and testimony!

LL said...

My heart breaks for your cousin...a good friend of mine just buried their little baby girl. I've watched 3 of my friends this past year say goodbye to young children--It's a heartache I cannot begin to imagine, so humbling. But I agree with you, our trials certainly do make us stronger. What a blessing the gospel brings as we experience comfort and can rely on the knowledge we have.

janica said...

thanks for this post and 'reminder':)

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